Bovine Scatolgy
In September of 2020, I still subscribed to the Denver Post, Denver’s only remaining daily newspaper. I got the Wednesday and Sunday editions in paper because I’m a dinosaur. It’s just more fun to read the funnies on paper. I started to read the Letters to the Editor and editorial pages.
On October 7, 2020, I responded to a Ken Buck editorial about how elections aren’t free and fair.
A few days later, I got this nearly incomprehensible letter, addressed to “Bovine Scatolgy” at my home address. As you can see, the US Postal Service delivered the letter.
Here’s how I read this gibberish:
The ROAD goes On forever AND the PARTY never ENDS</br/> THE SELF PROCLAIMED VICTIMIZATION OF LIBERAL AMERICA GOES ON AND ON</br/>
Once again the ever diminishing and nearly bankrupt denver post has wasted
newsprint and they waste a lot that they can’t afford with another stupid letter to</br/>
the editor.
It once was the Wash Post but it wasn’t nearly liberal enough. Now the entire
paper is consumed by junk submitted by the AP and the New York toilet paper
Times.
The Sunday non-edition of the opinion page is dominated by such stalwart rock
stars as Fried Nash, America hating Mimi, worse American hating Ian and a
host of one time wannabes that somehow get junk submitted to the opinion page
editor who as been spotted living under a bridge along the south Platte River.
Check out the usually large photos on the front page that features severely
oppressed minorities who somehow get the attention of certain wannabe writers
and once it goes to press sink into total oblivion never to be seen or heard again.
Such is the life for those who can’t distinguish between liberal bias and reality.
MAGA 4 more years.
Another nut job that’s not escaping the stereotypes about random capitalization and grammar. Printing a sticker for the address seems notable, as does going to whatever trouble it took to figure out my postal address. My guess is that the dude who wrote this, did it all the time. He’d gotten in trouble for it once or twice, maybe a police “wellness check”, or a cease-and-desist letter from someone’s lawyer. He adopted a few techniques like “no handwriting”, “drop off a batch of letters at the post office”, “use forever stamps purchased a while back”, to avoid even minor consequences.
I asked
Reddit’s r/Denver subreddit about it.
They didn’t add anything interesting.
I was hoping that a well-known crank sent these letters out all the time.
I think I got one other comment printed in the Denver Post later in 2020, but I did not receive a similar letter.